We all know that it’s not easy growing up gay and religious. The thing is, there’s nothing wrong with religion, but who you hang out with can make all the difference.
A gay man recently shared his life story with photographer Brandon Stanton of the famous ‘Humans of New York.’
The man opened up about his heartbreaking struggles with trying to accept his sexuality while holding on to his faith in God.
He shared that he was taught in church that homosexuality is wrong, which made him feel ashamed.
‘I call them clobber verses. There are six of them. They’re the verses that get used to hammer gay people,’ he told Stanton. ‘The funny thing is that I never felt pressured by God himself. Only his followers. But I desperately wanted God to change me. I didn’t want to be part of a group with so much shame attached to it.’
The shame drove him to want to ‘turn straight,’ and so he tried all he could to live life as a ‘normal’ straight person.
‘So I started praying in my twenties for God to make me straight,’ the man explained. ‘If I could have taken a pill, I would have.’
He continued: ‘I joined the ministry. I got married. I told my wife that I’d had experiences with men, but I convinced both of us that I could choose to be different. I wanted to be normal. I wanted kids. I thought it was just a matter of commitment.’
The man even tried ‘reparative therapy’ but nothing could change his attraction to men.
‘They tried to teach me that homosexuality wasn’t real. They said that I’d just had an overbearing mother. But I couldn’t change. I kept slipping up.
‘I couldn’t give my wife what she needed. My marriage ended. I had tried so hard but nothing worked.’
Thankfully the man had a realisation that turned his life around.
‘I got so angry with God for not keeping up his end of the bargain,’ he said. ‘But after some time, I finally realised why he wouldn’t change me.
‘He never felt like he needed to.’
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